


Reverent Regard

by ignorantfish



Series: Eyes Wide Open [2]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-09-02 13:13:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8668906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ignorantfish/pseuds/ignorantfish
Summary: A follow up to Silent Observance from Sonny's POV.tw: mentions of self-harm





	

Sonny would be lying if he said he wasn't surprised. Honestly, he's shocked. Floored. Not so much by the scars, but by the fact that Rafael was sharing this part of himself with him. That Rafael trusts him. 

Not that the scars aren't shocking in their own right, because they are. It's alarming to see Rafael like this. So vulnerable. So opposite of the unwavering, confident, court room Barba. This was not cocky, loud mouth, challenging Barba. This was vulnerable, hurting, begging Rafael. Begging Sonny to see him, to know him. 

Sonny feels wrecked. He leans in for a kiss because he doesn't know what else to do. He knows he can't go wrong with a kiss. It gives Barba a moment of privacy, a moment where Sonny isn't looking at him. He wants to give Rafael that. 

Sonny feels like crying, but he knows he has to keep it together. He lets Rafael have a moment but then he makes him look up. Sonny looks right into Rafael's eyes. Rafael looks so afraid, so small. Sonny tries to say it all with his eyes. That it's okay. That he accepts Rafael. That he understands. That he won't look at Rafael differently. That he doesn't see this as weakness at all, but rather strength. 

Rafael looks like he really can't take it anymore, the moment too intense, so Sonny breaks away. He moves down Rafael's body until he's eye level with Rafael's hips. He looks for permission and Rafael nods. So Sonny looks. He touches. He rubs his fingers gently over each scar, tracing the long lines. The scars are faded but there are so many. There's a lump in Sonny's throat. He doesn't want Rafael to feel ashamed of them. Not with him, not ever again. So he leans down and lets his lips follow his fingers, trying to convey everything he feels without words. 

Rafael tugs on his hair and Sonny sees that he is crying. He freezes, unsure what to do, until Rafael pulls him up into a kiss. It's so deep, so passionate, so full of emotion. Sonny starts crying too.

So he lays his body over Rafael's. Protects him. Covers every part of Rafael with a part of him. And for all of Sonny's generous loving, for all his giving of himself in the past, he's never been this intimate with anyone.


End file.
